Bon Apetit!

I'm buying breakfast and coffee in my local French Patisserie chain and the girl behind the counter watches me pour soy milk in my decaf.
- It's a good thing not to drink milk, she says. Did you hear about the cows?
- No?
- The milk is rotting. They give the cows so many hormones that the udders are swelling up and when the try milking them, the milk came out rotten.

With pastries and coffee in my hand, I try hard to not think about the big glasses of milk the kids just had for breakfast.
- Have a great day! She smiles. Enjoy the sunshine!

#%&*%$ moment

"Just what the world needs; another blonde babe", says a man who walks past me at the cheese counter at Safeway.
I guess 'babe' is kind if flattering but somehow I don't think was meant to be.

Sunday downtown

This us what you get after a long day shopping with Holly, who's grown out of her ALL her clothes in the space of a week.
They were delicious.
It was necessary to walk an extra few blocks afterwards.  

Ipod

My one month old Ipod stopped breathing last week, and never recovered, so I took it back to the Apple Store to exchange it. Turns out you have to jump through quite a few hoops in order to leave with a new one. First they need to see what's wrong with it, and to see if they can fix it, and to do that, you need to book an appointment at the Genius Bar. First available appointment? A week later.
I'm not waiting a week for you to tell me what I already know, I say. I'd like you to replace it. If you take a faulty item back to the store you get an exchange. You don't get sent away and asked to come back a week later.
I have to become a really annoying person for the girl to realize I meant business. What makes her finally change her mind?
- If I wait for another week, I will have been without music for three weeks.
- I'll see what I can do, she says, and calls a "Genius" over to troubleshoot.
Does it work with the charger? Have I tried to reset it? Did I drop it on the floor?
He finally agrees to give me a new one.

I remember the days when you fixed your Walkman with scotch tape and rubber bands. It didn't take weeks, only seconds.
When did things get so complicated?

Hollie McNish performs 'Language Learning' - For some reason I am hooked

Sunshine and pizza in North Beach

I am a sucker for american rock!

Phosphorescent are playing at the Independent in April!

Book cloud

A general consensus on books everyone should read.

It's a beautifuly complex thing called floor heating

What I came across on my way home:

As if it was just waiting for me to find it.
I'd had a few drinks. I thought it was a funny contradiction.

Martinis on a Thursday night

Aub Zam Zam is the cave of death. It suck you in and spits you out a drunken mess a few hours later. Their Martini's are a lethal concoction that will give you the worst headache of the decade the next day.
After only two of these little babies last night, I have spent most of my day in pyjamas curled up in fetal position.
I love Zam Zam but I will never be able to go there again - I need to gold on to my last brain cell for many years to come.

PS: The company was exquisite. I haven't laughed that much for a long time.

When alpha parenting isn't enough

I usually take Finn to zoo Friday mornings. They have a "zoo camp" for preschoolers where they get to talk about animals, do some art projects and walk around the zoo for a bit with one of the carers. If you're of my ilk, it's cute, innocent and age appropriate, until a three year old Pete start to recite all the animals he knew that started with the letter "N", first in English, then in Spanish, for good measure. I look confused at Finn and ask him quietly if he knows any animals that begin with "N". He thinks for a very long time and then says:
- I know! Mummy! And giraffe.

The teacher holds up a picture with a funny looking sea creature with a long unicorn-like horn sticking out from the head and asks the class if anyone knows what it is. The name is on the whiteboard in front of us and I can hear Pete's mother whisper the name to Pete. I start to whisper to Finn too.
- It's a narwahl, shouts the little boy.
I still whisper the name to Finn, desperately trying to get him to be a close two.
- Narwahl. N-a-r-w-a-h-l.
I don't even know if I pronounce it correctly.
- What, mummy? says Finn. Norball?
The rest of the group are busy listening to Pete telling the teacher that the narwahl's horn is a really long tooth. His mother is beaming.
- We read up on it last night, she says to anyone who wants to listen.
They must have studied narwahls right about the same time as Finn was busy stuffing Lego pieces in the air vent and wipe his nose on Holly's arm.

After circle time we walk over to the arts and crafts table while Pete loudly share all things alphabet and zoo related with the rest of us.
Finn grabs a piece of paper and a crayon and starts drawing.
- Look, he says. I made a "norball".

I take a look. You don't have to try very hard to imagine the oval circle as the body, and the long line replacing the nose as the long tooth and with two round eyes to match.
- You made a narwahl, I acknowledge, possibly a little louder than necessary. The teacher comes over. She compliments Finn on his beautiful narwahl. Pete's mother leans over the table and pulls it out of my hand.
- Oh yeah, look honey - let's see if you can do a narwahl too.
Pete is whining because he's tired.
- I don't wann'u, he cries and kick his mothers chair.
The mother fake-smiles.
- It's OK honey. We can draw one at home and bring it in next time.
And then she turns to the teacher:
- What animal are we learning about next week?

Finn is pillow fighting and is not at all interested in narwahls any more.

Power struggle

- I don't need any backseat drivers, said the taxi driver to me. I had tried to tell him that my cross street wasn't really my cross street but I use that one, because no one has ever heard of my real cross street.
- I don't need any backseat drivers, he said, and proceeded to engage Richard in light conversation.


What a nice man.

Best tip I ever got

If you want to find out how noisy the neighborhood is that you will move to, go bar hopping on Columbus and Broadway, walk past your new house at midnight and become the very nuisance that you will want to avoid once you've moved in by standing outside the house looking up at the empty apartment for a long time, then sit down on the steps and wait to see if drunk people relieve themselves on your new doorway.

An easier option would be to spend the night at Washington Square Inn around the corner instead.

This is my near future:

I also had to make a stop at DMV -

I have a great life.

Can't wait

I have to go and spend the day at the Social Security Office - again. Fun times.
I'm bringing a book, a phone, an ipod, a news paper, some snacks, a bottle of water, change of clothes, toothbrush-